i've just uploaded a lot of pictures in my http://www.ladiedidi.spaces.live.com/ those were pics taken over the weeks i've been miting him..
anw,friday didnt go well,though the party was great..team's target were not met coz everyone was having so much fun..went home after and felt shitty..as me and him lash over the fone..the first squabble eversince ns..the next day had been planned..whereby he'll be spending time with his family and myself with mum,pipi and ally over at town..treated family to pizza hut and bought my uncle's tie at tangs and sent them off to the bus stop..it was past 8pm by then..ej was still stuck at raffles..headed to wisma..walked for a bit..then left for the train station..there,i waited for him till past 9pm..i was already feeling so pissed coz i noe time would be limited for us..there,i sat,fuming mad..i hate short mit-ups..i dun see a reason to mit up if we have to separate so early..finally he came,and boy were we so distanced..walked thru the crowd and headed to somerset mrt..both were not talking to each other..with no place to go,i shadowed his footsteps,while he did mine..coz we both didnt talk to each other thruout and had no idea where our feet were bringing us..finally we stopped and he held my hand and whispered 'lanson'.i was still mad.so i just followed.didnt say a word.he hugged and i rested on his chest,unwillingly,although the monster inside purred a little bit.didnt wanna swallow my ego and pride.hence i walked with a crease on my forehead.brat.
reached there,we were sitting quite apart..i felt so bad and disgusted with myself coz i didnt make him better as he was retching and all i did was to pass him my Hugo bottle..he didnt wanna drink..there,his eyes full of fresh tears,the aftermath of puking and looked at me..we had been silent for the whole journey and half an hour of sitting at lanson..past 10pm already..and he tried to cool me down..eventually i gave in,as time was past 10.30..i didnt wanna part..i knew we had to go off soon..and i didnt wan2...i hugged him and felt like crying..i realli missed him so much and having that tiff didnt help to bring us closer..and those silence..so near,yet so far apart..alas,we walked off and had supper at mcdees..past 11pm..he made me laugh so hard..and i realli felt so special that night..coz he rememberd the little things that usually dun realli matter..but now,it does..it amuse me still and im appreciative of how his mind thinks of wat he should do to make me better..thanks,baby..
took the second last train and we spent the night together..
.sunday.
got home past 1pm and i uploaded the pics at pipi's laptop and washed up..rushed out again at 3.30pm and bump into zul at 969 railing.went to ej's place..and we ate as his mum made small talks with me and 'interrogated' me about last night..hehe..zul was sniggering away..cb..rushed out at 6 and we headed to sid's place coz baby missed amber and boy had she grown!!so cute..and she wanted me!!:)yes,she could stand already,but for a mere 5seconds,and plop,she'll fall on her butt.so cute!!and she looovveee the shoes i bought for her..and so off we went again,this time to end the day...
while walking towards the interchange,he fell silent..and told me that he's gonna miss me..and he dun feel like gng back to camp..coz he noes he'll miss me..and shunning away a man's pride and dignity,tears filled his eyes and i knew i had to be strong..coz when im weak,he'll pick me up..and now,it's the other way round.hand in hand we walked as i assured him and tried to make him smile..part of me felt like crying too coz we noe it's gonna be hard all over again..and time will nvr be enuf to feel contented..so then,we started to sing his morning march song..and i echoed him..and we felt better.."in the early morning march,with a fieldpack on my back.with the aching in my heart,and my body full of sweat.i'm a long long way from home,as i miss my lover so."and then i forgot how the lyrics go..
upon stepping on the escalator at yishun mrt,both fell silent.turned,at the same time said "i hate this part."we knew we're gonna take the train to separate our ways..thank god for his civilian clothing,we hugged.as we reached chua chu kang,i gave a slight pull to avoid him from standing from his seat..i didnt want him to go..waited for darf and sufi and there,i cried at the bus stop.buried my face on his chest as he stroked my hair and whispered words of comfort..i knew im gonna miss him..and i already was missing him..kissed,hugged,kiss his hand and he gave a peck on my forehead,bid him goodbye as the bus went past me and i hung my head low with darf beside me missing sufi..
waking up from a short sleep,my heart felt something amiss..and im starting to hate mondays..coz that's when things will start all over again..to be strong,to have my days filled with work and to not think about him so much..
i could hear you sing..and im echoing you..
happy monday,emptiness..
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