keep..holding on...
that song by avril lavigne kept playing in my head the whole day..yet i didn't do anything abt it..just let it play freely in my mind..i woke up with a start,thinking he texted me..instead,someone else..i went back to sleep.anticipating,cheking my mobile and gng though my texts..wouldnt noe if i opened my incoming texts while being asleep..none from him..i hoped again..endlessly..
wat is the secret to your sin?of paranoia.of insecurity.of drama.of hopes,dreams and wishing.impulsive.forgetting someone is by hating them..that is easier for me to do..but there's no way that i could hate him..there's nothing that i could hate him for..he had been the most perfect imperfect person i ever could come across..
hell,where would u find someone that couldnt contain his excitement and gush out the planned surprise..yet,end of it,u're still shocked and surprised by it all..where would u find someone that would go all the way from yishun..taking 2 buses of an hour journey long to just fetch his gf at the void deck..for this 13months++ he had nvr failed that routine,only if there's a reason not to..where would u find someone that would pamper his gf so much that he accepts the fact that she's a brat and spoiled her even more..where would u find someone that would cry shamelessly and u still think that he is a real man because he teared.
i chose this and i shouldn't turn back.maybe now is too early for me to end things.but wat i could foresee,an end to this relationship will happen once everything else starts for him..it's not easy..yea..im not strong enuf neither am i up to the challenge..but maybe there's too much sacrifices and too much pain that i've gone thru in this relationship with him that i just cant face anymore fallen hopes or even not seeing him..
disappointment.he couldnt assure me with the questions that i asked.all u said was u don't know.so how am i to know,ej?insecurity got the best of me..regrets?i will one day.coz there's nobody that i will ever find to have such character in him,neither would any be able to do the things he does as mentioned earlier.
he truly is a great guy.so they say.."hold on to the person u love..not the person u like". there's nvr a person that i like at the first place..it had always been just him..the break up is just coz of obstacles that's gonna make my life tumble.and yea,im not up for it..not anymore..as i said to u,love..when u suffer,i suffer much more...
i called to hear ur voice..im still in denial..i can just eat my words and we can start all over again..but i noe that in days/weeks/months to come,we'll still be stuck in the situation we are currently in..and u still wont be able to assure me..so wat am i to do?linger ard to get hurt still?or make use of the time..and then let go?
i dunno y but im still wearing the engagement ring..and im still wearing the ring that marks our beginning..im still wearing the black cable wire that only YOU know what it means..and your name is still impaled in my heart,intact within my skin and carved in the sky..i don't know when it will all go away..i don't even know when i would want it to go away..
maybe i should take back my words and we'll be together again..and maybe...just maybe..i need u right now at the most to clear this pregnant mind of mine and enlighten me.i need you at the most right now..but u're nowhere..neither were u anywhere when we talked about the problem we're facing..that's the thing,ej..you were nvr there to give me assurances..and i cant live without it,knowing how i can think to the extend of misery.now, where are you..
chrystalline tears rolled down blushed cheeks as each time her heart beats,it's all slowly fading..fading..?never had been..pounding hard your name with mine as i tried and tried to make believe..in denial as i can be as the memories replayed fresh in mind..never i thought it could be so hard..falling,falling..the end of our journey..no...never i thought it could be this hard..
that song by avril lavigne kept playing in my head the whole day..yet i didn't do anything abt it..just let it play freely in my mind..i woke up with a start,thinking he texted me..instead,someone else..i went back to sleep.anticipating,cheking my mobile and gng though my texts..wouldnt noe if i opened my incoming texts while being asleep..none from him..i hoped again..endlessly..
wat is the secret to your sin?of paranoia.of insecurity.of drama.of hopes,dreams and wishing.impulsive.forgetting someone is by hating them..that is easier for me to do..but there's no way that i could hate him..there's nothing that i could hate him for..he had been the most perfect imperfect person i ever could come across..
hell,where would u find someone that couldnt contain his excitement and gush out the planned surprise..yet,end of it,u're still shocked and surprised by it all..where would u find someone that would go all the way from yishun..taking 2 buses of an hour journey long to just fetch his gf at the void deck..for this 13months++ he had nvr failed that routine,only if there's a reason not to..where would u find someone that would pamper his gf so much that he accepts the fact that she's a brat and spoiled her even more..where would u find someone that would cry shamelessly and u still think that he is a real man because he teared.
i chose this and i shouldn't turn back.maybe now is too early for me to end things.but wat i could foresee,an end to this relationship will happen once everything else starts for him..it's not easy..yea..im not strong enuf neither am i up to the challenge..but maybe there's too much sacrifices and too much pain that i've gone thru in this relationship with him that i just cant face anymore fallen hopes or even not seeing him..
disappointment.he couldnt assure me with the questions that i asked.all u said was u don't know.so how am i to know,ej?insecurity got the best of me..regrets?i will one day.coz there's nobody that i will ever find to have such character in him,neither would any be able to do the things he does as mentioned earlier.
he truly is a great guy.so they say.."hold on to the person u love..not the person u like". there's nvr a person that i like at the first place..it had always been just him..the break up is just coz of obstacles that's gonna make my life tumble.and yea,im not up for it..not anymore..as i said to u,love..when u suffer,i suffer much more...
i called to hear ur voice..im still in denial..i can just eat my words and we can start all over again..but i noe that in days/weeks/months to come,we'll still be stuck in the situation we are currently in..and u still wont be able to assure me..so wat am i to do?linger ard to get hurt still?or make use of the time..and then let go?
i dunno y but im still wearing the engagement ring..and im still wearing the ring that marks our beginning..im still wearing the black cable wire that only YOU know what it means..and your name is still impaled in my heart,intact within my skin and carved in the sky..i don't know when it will all go away..i don't even know when i would want it to go away..
maybe i should take back my words and we'll be together again..and maybe...just maybe..i need u right now at the most to clear this pregnant mind of mine and enlighten me.i need you at the most right now..but u're nowhere..neither were u anywhere when we talked about the problem we're facing..that's the thing,ej..you were nvr there to give me assurances..and i cant live without it,knowing how i can think to the extend of misery.now, where are you..
chrystalline tears rolled down blushed cheeks as each time her heart beats,it's all slowly fading..fading..?never had been..pounding hard your name with mine as i tried and tried to make believe..in denial as i can be as the memories replayed fresh in mind..never i thought it could be so hard..falling,falling..the end of our journey..no...never i thought it could be this hard..
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